The Definitive Guide to Natural Birth Control and Pregnancy Achievement. Toni Weschler, MPH

Taking Charge of Your Fertility is THE all-time must-read book for anyone with a uterus. So if you love (or even just like) anyone with a uterus, you ought to make it your personal mission to get a copy into her hands – pronto. When I first discovered Toni Weschler’s book, at 23, I was simultaneously thrilled to bits and seriously ticked off. Here my body had been doing its thing for a decade and no one had bothered to give me the skinny. Boy, was I late to the party. To catch up, I devoured the book in a matter of days and referred to it countless times in the past 4 years.

Writing with an accessible, conversational tone, Toni Weschler shows the way toward understanding your fertility cycles. She doesn’t assume you’re an ob/gyn; each new term is clearly explained. With Ms. Weschler, you learn about everything from avoiding pregnancy to baby-making and beyond. Each chapter is fascinating, regardless of its topic. You’ll want to read the book cover to cover, but it’s organized so you can hone in on the chapters you find handiest. Either way, TCOYF walks you through the scientifically proven signs of fertility: waking body temperature, cervical fluid and cervical position. Better still, Ms. Weschler clearly describes the art of charting – the way you’ll make sense of these signs to determine when you’re fertile. Once you've learned the signs, you can use Fertility Awareness to gauge either when to try to get pregnant, or when to avoid getting pregnant.

Like many women, I spent years living in fear of my fertility. I took the Pill because condoms seemed too risky as a means of pregnancy prevention, but even on the pill I was paranoid. Sound crazy? You bet. But it’s not uncommon. Talking with my friends, it was clear we were all just as scared, clueless, and misinformed. One day I had a revelation: while I was on the pill I wasn’t ovulating, and if I wasn’t ovulating then I wasn’t truly menstruating. Duh, right? I’d spent so much time suppressing my fertility I’d overlooked this basic principle: my ovaries were in a coma. While I’d never stopped to question it before, suddenly it seemed very wrong and I couldn’t wait to get the synthetic hormones out of my system. I was determined to find a reliable form of birth control that didn’t mess with my chemistry. A couple weeks later I struck gold with a copy of TCOYF.

This book has nothing in common with your junior high sex ed class, which for many of us had less to do with sex education as sex intimidation. Back then the recurring message was an ominous variation on “you just never know.” Meaning: you just never know when you’re going to get pregnant, drop out of high school, bring shame on your family and die. After years of believing I couldn’t possibly understand my body, I’m forever grateful for what TCOYF has taught me. You will be too!

Now, maybe some of you are saying, “Good for you, but I just don’t have time for that. Besides, I can hardly remember to take the Pill – I could never trust myself with Fertility Awareness.” Well, there’s nothing fun or interesting about swallowing a pill, sticking on a patch, or inserting a ring – so it’s no wonder they get forgotten. Fertility Awareness is a completely new experience. With each cycle, you’ll learn fascinating things about your body – stuff you probably thought you could never know. After charting your first cycle, you’ll be hooked. You’ll look forward to plugging in your info and seeing your cycle evolve. Pretty soon, it’ll be second nature; and after you take the time to read TCOYF, you’ll spend no more than minute or two each day observing your fertility signs. Yep, it’s that easy.

You might also be thinking, “Hey, this sounds like the Rhythm Method. What are you trying to pull on me?!” The Fertility Awareness Method is not the Rhythm Method. If you take away one thing from this review, please let it be that. The Rhythm Method isn’t a method; it’s a guess. It's based on a combination of information from your own past cycles and of women's cycles in general – making it a sloppy guess at best. Cycle lengths and day of ovulation vary widely between women and are rarely perfectly consistent even for the same woman. What occurred in previous cycles, let alone the cycles of other women, may have no relevance in predicting your current cycle.

While I've spent most of this review raving about Fertility Awareness as birth control, applied in reverse it can be just as effective in conceiving. As many of you may know, achieving pregnancy isn't always as easy as it's cracked up to be. Whatever your cycle length or day of ovulation, you can know it every month by practicing Fertility Awareness. You can read your body’s signs to discover each unique cycle. Even if you’re not concerned with avoiding pregnancy or ever hoping to achieve it, Taking Charge of Your Fertility is guaranteed to deepen your understanding of your menstrual cycle. And why is that important? I’ll leave that one to the expert. Ms. Weschler writes,

“…sexuality, fertility, childbirth, and menopause are all facets of being female, and charting is the edifying window into these aspects of a woman’s life. The self-knowledge available from Fertility Awareness is a valuable resource for all kinds of personal decision-making.Perhaps most important, it encourages women to value and trust knowledge provided by their own bodies.”

Please note: Using the Fertility Awareness Method to avoid pregnancy is recommended only for monogamous couples with the maturity and dedication to faithfully observe the fertility signs. As with other non-barrier methods such as the Pill, FAM does not protect against STDs.